Cheese Tree

The muse descended again as I was leaving Bardic Madness. As a result, I got to spend most of the drive home composing a filk of Greensleeves thanks to an inspired moment of storytelling improv by a fellow aspiring bard. This is all your fault, Marcial de Salas. (Thanks!)

As a point of reference, Glochidion ferdinandi is known as the cheese tree. Sadly, it bears not the fruit of my desire. (Also, I don’t actually care for Swiss but it’s much more recognizable than Sage, which is one of my very favorites.)

What cheese is this upon my plate
with leaves of green attached to it?
Oh, it must be a Cheese Tree
from whose branches this Swiss came, surely.

Cheese Tree, you are my joy!
Give up your fruit, let’s not be coy.
Cheese! Cheese for everyone!
The taste, like manna from heaven.

So to the garden I did run
to find the source of my passion.
There in the lee with flowers three,
a cheese covered tree with bark ashen.


What’s this? A Brie upon the tree
and here a Muenster and Stilton.
And look! Just there, a plump Gruyere!
I’ll need a much bigger carton.


I’ll duck beneath your branches wide
to find the Cheese Curds that love to hide
and in your crown, a Lavistown!
I may just not ever come back down.


Now plum is lovely and apple, too
and cherries when they’re in season
but it’s the truth beyond reproof
that I love cheese more than reason.

The taste is like manna from heaven!